After last week, and all its stress, I seem to be having trouble concentrating on anything. I hate my writing, I haven't the lung power to go bolt out a song, really. I could go paint, but can't get up the mojo to do so. I just seem lost, really. I know it will all come back to me, but for now it's all up in the air. This is when a person has to find their mentor and get re-inspired.
Have you ever seen that movie CARNIVAL OF SOULS, where the main character goes through episodes where she feels invisible to the rest of the world? She speaks and no one hears her? She walks, and all she can hear is the sound of her own footsteps? That's me. I mean, I've always felt like that, but I really feel like that tonight.
You know what I need? Georgy Girl. One of my other favorite movie characters. I love that film so much, because she is me. I'm Georgy. When I was fourteen--alone on a typical blue Saturday night--that movie came on and really changed me. Georgy was carefree, yet heavy with life's problems: freak hair, tall, goofy, talked strange, wanted love but wouldn't take it unless it was real, loved freedom and youth and creativity. I just loved the way she took everything and made it special in her own way. Alan Bates was hot and insanely insane. It moved me that he saw something in her that everyone else brushed aside. She was gorgeous, she was funny, she was spirited, and she had a real soul.
Anyway, gotta go find that movie. "It takes a whole lotta woman . . ."