Q is for Query
Dear Agent Sparkly Pants:
Fourteen-year-old Joni Weaver is a proud member of the Freak Table. That’s where all the uncool kids sit everyday for lunch at Hell, er, Hellman High. Perhaps the honor was earned by her wardrobe of sparkly clothing (shouldn’t have given her mom that Bedazzler for Christmas) and buck teeth, or maybe it’s her strange inability to speak when spoken to without sounding like a broken record.
But those ain’t problems. Living in a house with seven cats is a problem. Having a mom who plays online poker all day is a problem. Having an estranged father who works in the projector room at the local movie theater with a bottle of whiskey in his hands is a problem. And when’s that darn first period gonna start? Now that’s a problem. Joni’s about ready to explode, a nice solution to her semi-doomed existence.
Pressured into trying out for the school play, Joni decides to make everyone see she’s more than just a member of the Freak Table. That she just might be somebody. That the rhinestones, and the dead-beat mom, the Virgin Mary status, the Southern Comfort guzzling dad and his new needy wife, they’re not her. She can escape. She can prevail. But first . . . she’s gonna have to try out.
‘BYE JONI WEAVER is a YA mainstream of 70,000 words. Thank you for your time and consideration.