How to get rid of Heat
I'm interrupting this program to alert you to a recent problem. Heat. She came to lunch and stayed for dinner. She wrapped herself around the back porch with long arms, and then began stepping all over my flowers and my bean plants, the grass, the apple trees. She takes the breath right out of bees, and fleas, and she's, I'm afraid, never going to leave. I don't know what to do. I'm running out of ice. I've worn this same bikini, one-hundred-and-twice. Maybe I'll buy her a ticket. Yes, that's a good idea. A ticket. To Spain. Or France. Where she can run and dance. Like a ballerina, pirouette away, away, away, away. You were never meant to stay.
You know, they recommend putting sheets in the freezer for an hour before bedtime. Better yet, just sleep in the freezer. Or stand there all night, using a bag of frozen peas for a pillow.