Horrible, disgusting post

Last year in one of my many quests for healthy living I bought a box of Kashi GoLean Crunch. I wasn't looking to lose weight necessarily--though I can be somewhat obsessed with staying thin--it was more about detoxing and feeling good. The cereal tasted great, though it was a bit too crunchy. Even soaked in milk (rice milk for me) for extended amounts of time it maintained a rock-like crunch that rattled my teeth and gave my jaw quite a workout. But it tasted good. I had been afraid that Kashi would be all benefit and no pleasure. I liked it so much that for the next few days I ate it as a snack, instead of cookies or chips. But then about one evening in, I began to notice a horrible stench was following me around. I was experiencing some unusual bloating and gas, but not your usual bloating and gas. This was like super evil bloating and gas . . . with a horrible odor. But that stench just couldn't be me. I looked around to see if Henry the dachshund had been around. Nope. I ate more cereal. Another day went by and I was still having really bad gas with a horrid, rotten flesh/rotten egg aftershock. Slowly, and with dread, I realized that I could possibly be the maker of this deadly oxygen mutating nuclear plant power gas. Me. The first thing I did was stop eating the cereal. Then I went online and began to read story after story of all the other fools who'd been lured in to healthy living only to be turned into the most hideous humans on earth. Some accounts were so funny that I laughed myself into hysteria. I think it was just a relief to find out I wasn't the one making the evil stench. I mean, I was, but it wasn't me me, it was Kashi.

Have any of you tried this stuff? Had similar results? It would make a great party favor at Spencers. Or they could package it for Halloween in cute little bags with a skull and crossbones for decoration.

All I can say is losing weight and being healthy can't be worth losing your social life. I don't want to die lonely.